engaged!

No. Not me. Last week I aggressively stomped out a heart-shaped pile of slush and a 6th grader shook her head and remarked, "And that's why you'll never find love."

My dear friends Michael and Alyssa, however, have found love in a hopeless place. When I saw their engagement on facebook -- yes I saw it on facebook first and no I don't miss the days when people cared enough to call or send a message on a horse or whatever people used to do -- I screamed. Even though I don't believe in marriage (I know, I know, do I believe in anything? No.), I do love love.

Even Slytherins believe in love

Freshman gym class. That's where Michael and I first met. He was fresh from New York, a bonafied East Coaster transplanted to the great state of Kansas. He had no friends but a huge ego (sorry pal, it's the truth) so he was not afraid to chatter away. These were the days of sitting in alphabetical order, so we end up next to each other. Note: The beginning of the alphabet is where it's at. There are details from that first convo that I cannot divulge in order to protect the parties involved, but suffice it to say I did not anticipate being friends that year, let alone 8 years later. Then he started singing A Whole New World and everything changed.

A few things about Michael:
- Michael is extremely nerdy & loves things like Star Wars & debate.
- Michael enjoys foreign cultures & was the only person in our Spanish class who actually enjoyed the experience.
- Michael can sing really well and was in many a high school musical (not to be confused with High School Musical, the catalyst for my love story with Zac Efron).
- Michael once wore a jersey to school. It was hilarious.
- Michael is a drama queen.

Senior year of high school... was a joke

The Michael of yesteryear was a free bird. He flittered about for many years, always claiming he would never settle down to make a permanent nest. I am making the bird analogy to avoid using the words "slutty phase." Then came Alyssa and everything changed again.

A few things about Alyssa:
- Alyssa is a redhead, but in that intriguing, distinctive Ariel sort of way, not the bizarre, oh-god-she's-weird Annie sort of way.
- Alyssa is a great hostess & always provides food for us, which is all I ask for in a friend.
- Alyssa tends to fall asleep while watching movies. By that I mean every time I've ever watched a movie at her apartment she has fallen asleep.
- Alyssa is going to nursing school &, in terms of getting her shit together, is a full 5 steps ahead of the rest of us.
- Alyssa is one of the most laid back people I've ever met. Nothing seems to phase her.

Everybody loves a theme pic with racist undertones

Based on my comprehensive character sketches of these two souls, you should have a full visual of how rom-com perfect the pair is: some hilarious differences that make for audience entertainment and a little spice but true compatibility and alignment where it counts. Bonus: brown babies on deck! WHOO HOO!

This is the first friend wedding I'm attending, which makes makes me question some things: is my friend count too low? do I choose friends who are loveless? are friends getting married without telling me? Regardless, this is going to be a celebration of love and commitment blah blah blah but mainly a fiesta for the ages! I am truly happy for my pals & I wish them a lifetime of happiness. But before that starts, can't wait for Michael to sing A Whole New World to Alyssa during the reception!